Lazy Squirrel Gets a Headache

I need a Tylenol!

I am a people watcher. I can go to Disneyland and be happy sitting on a bench watching the people just walk by. I think it is a learned trait. When I was a little kid and my parents didn’t have money for entertainment like going to a movie on a Friday night we would jump into the car and drive to town. It was Oskaloosa, a small Iowa town and the stores stayed open on Friday night. We would park on the square in front of the stores and just watch the people walk by. Sometimes we would go over to the Band Stand and sit on a bench and listen to the music. If they spotted someone they knew they would come over to the car and talk. When my parents felt like they had a little more money than usual we might walk over to Putt’s on the corner and get a bag of Caramel Corn.

Life was a lot different back then we found our entertainment and happiness in people and doing small things. Unlike today when we have to be watching flat screens and pushing buttons. We are bombarded with electronic gadgets. People on the street rarely look at you and smile because their ear is glued to their cell phone.

Well, I still go back to the old ways. Katrina and I often find ourselves sitting on the front porch listening to the birds in the evening and watching the fireflies. It isn’t exciting but it sure is entertaining and relaxing. We often also sit on the screened in back porch where we can listen to our little waterfall and watch the squirrels collect their acorns for the winter.

From this vantage point we also have a good view of the pasture and the miniature donkeys and other animals at play. It’s the squirrels I really like to watch. They scamper through the yard and jump from tree to tree with complete ease. They seem to absolutely love to drive Dolly (our dog) nuts. They will run along the ground and as soon as she spots them they take off and stay on the ground just long enough to give her hope that she might catch one of them and then they jump for a tree and climb just high enough to be out of her reach and then turn around and taunt her. I actually expect some day they will drop an acorn on her head for one last bit of humiliation.

However, there seems to be one squirrel that isn’t quite as sharp as the others and maybe just a little bit lazy. He is probably one of the younger ones. Katrina keeps a couple of large bird cages on the screened-in porch with Doves in them. That is an entirely different story for another day.

Birds eat seeds and birds are messy eaters so there is always a scattering of seeds on the floor under the bird cages. Although the porch is screened, Garth, the wildest Saluki in captivity, has managed to rip a couple of holes into the screens. These holes provide terrific access for lazy squirrels.

It seems this one squirrel has found that he can enter the porch and fill his tummy and his cheeks with seeds with no potential threats from Dolly or his fellow squirrels. Unfortunately, Mr. Squirrel didn’t realize I often use the back porch on my route to the barn. On this occasion I interrupted his little feast and scared the seeds right out of him.

In his haste he forgot how he entered the porch so he headed straight for the glass door. BAM! He hit it head first at full speed; picked himself up and ran back to the bird cage for protection. But as soon as he got there he turned and ran again for the door.

BAM! He did it again and again. Now I can only feel sorry for this little guy for so long but I was laughing so hard I couldn’t open the door. With his head pounding and his heart racing he remembered the torn screen and jumped for the ledge. He was so pumped up on adrenaline at this point he didn’t even land on the ledge. He jumped clear out to the railing on the stairs from there it was just an instant and he cleared Dolly sitting directly under him. She looked up in amazement as he seemed to fly from the stair railing to the tree 30 feet away. Before his feet hit the tree they were already racing in a blur. When he did reach the tree it was like a bolt of lightening going up the tree. He didn’t stop until he was at the top swinging back and forth from the tiniest of branches.

I don’t know if it was the look on the squirrels face after hitting the glass door repeatedly or Dolly’s face when the squirrel jumped over her that was the funniest but I laughed all afternoon.

Believe it or not this same squirrel repeated this same event twice more during the past summer when I was going outside!

I love to watch the animals, they don’t have to beat their heads on a glass door to entertain me, but the little boy in me does get a chuckle out of it when they do.

Filed Under: The Ranch


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